A Peaceful Future Is A Gift

How will I know if I should divorce?

On Behalf of | Aug 8, 2023 | Divorce |

Maybe your marriage has not been going well lately. Perhaps it has not been going well for a long time. Does that mean you should get a divorce? Or is it just a bump on the long road together that lies ahead?

One clinical psychologist shared how she helps people to decide. Asking yourself the following questions that she poses to her clients may help you decide:

Are you happy that you have tried everything?

You don’t want to regret telling your spouse that it’s over. Knowing that you have left no stone unturned in attempting to make the marriage work can allow you to be at peace with any final decision you make. It’s a bit like giving your best in a race or sports match – you might not always win, but you’ll know you gave it your all and that the result was out of your control.

Do you know what life post-divorce will look like?

Are you jumping blind or do you have a realistic picture of how things will be? If you don’t, try making one. You might discover you don’t like it and would prefer to work on rebuilding your marriage.

What is keeping you in the marriage?

Maybe you can reel off a list of things you don’t like about your spouse or your marriage. If so, why are you still there? Are you scared to end it? Or do you not really want to end it at all?

How long can you continue living as you are?

Assuming that your spouse is not going to change and the things you are unhappy about are not going to change either – can you see yourself living like this for another six months? A year? Ten years? 

Asking yourself these hard questions may help you decide if you want to try counseling or similar to try and save your marriage, or if it is time to learn more about divorce.